Sempre

"While Sempre is a work of fiction, the concept of modern-day slavery is not make-believe. There are an estimated 27 million people in the world today, coerced and forced into sexual or labor slavery. The majority of them are female, half being young girls. They’re our mothers, our fathers, our sisters, our brothers. They’re our friends, our lovers, our neighbors, our kids. They’re us. It could happen to anyone,
even you.

Human trafficking is the second most lucrative crime in the world, making more money every year than Google, Nike, and Starbucks combined. It happens everywhere, from the poverty-stricken providences of Cambodia to the affluent suburbs of California. Two children are trafficked every minute—that’s 2880 a day.

Become an abolitionist.
If we don’t fight for them, who will?" ~J.M. Darhower

Disclaimer: I do not own the image above.

How Do I 'Think'?

For me, “Not to think critically is a preference”. I believe it is human nature to take the easy way of things and as much as possible avoid complicated situations and difficult problems. It is a challenge to think, not just plainly “think” but to think critically, for it utilizes so much energy. And to be able to think critically, I have to have enough mental capacity to do so. 

I suppose that I know how to think. No. I know that I know how to think. Although I don’t deny the fact that there are instances wherein I get really lazy – lazy to think things critically or thoroughly, lazy to use my brain and get it working. However, despite the “laziness”, I could say that I am not just a receiver of information nor do I easily accept information given to me as it is. There are times when something is presented to me, no matter how simple it may be, I tend to magnify it and try to consider its possible consequence, “what is in it for me”, its advantages and disadvantages, the other possibilities, and the like. (I account this thought process from the way UP has taught me to think critically, and the manner of how my parents have brought me up wherein I should try to question things and be not afraid to ask questions.) A lot of times I play the devil’s advocate in group discussion or brainstorming or when making decisions, I think out of the box sometimes. Conversely, there are also cases wherein I tend to get apathetic and just follow the majority’s say on issues. Basically, how I think things depends on the kind of mood that I am in. 

If I’ll analyze and categorize myself using Jean Piaget’s Cognitive Stages Theory, I would have to say proudly that I am currently in the Formal Operational Period (haha J)! Why? Because I am by now able to think things logically, even if the rigid scientific method kind of thinking seldom occurs. But, it is not all the time that I think rationally. There are occasions wherein I think unscientifically, I base my judgment on a specific thing’s salient point, consequently disregarding its details and deeper implications. Furthermore, egocentrism is still evident in me, specifically when I’m with my cousins, I think that my “drafted solutions” or plan of actions are better compared to theirs, which I know isn’t nice, though I don’t express this thought to them. Moreover, I am also preoccupied of dreaming about my future, at times I imagine myself in various occupational and social roles. And I just laugh at myself for those silly thoughts, though deep in my heart, I really would like them to happen, to be my “reality” in the future. Also, most of the times, I reflect on my own thinking and that of others. 

My thought process randomly switches from Formal Operational Period to Concrete Operational Period (the "Chaos" Pattern in Piaget's Cognitive Development Theory) from time to time depending on the kind of problem or situation or stimulus I am faced with and on my mood at that moment.

How about you? How do you 'think'? Do you ever 'think' at all (haha)?

Between Culture And Human Rights

Culture is an idea that’s basically over killed. It is often used in people’s regular conversations without conscious thought, without delving further how powerful it is in every sense, and the numerous meanings it connote. For some of us, perhaps we could refer it to an appreciation of good literature, splendid music, remarkable art, and sumptuous food. For a biologist, it could be a colony of microbes in a laboratory Petri dish per se. However, for social scientists specifically anthropologists, culture is the full range of learned human behaviour patterns. 

In the study of culture, we have to consider a lot of variables specifically when it comes to scrutinizing a particular culture’s practices. But can we really judge a culture? Who are we to judge the rightness or wrongness of one culture’s practices? In a culturally diverse world, can universal human rights exist?

Cultural relativism theorizes that human rights are culturally relative rather than universal. What may be right to particular culture may be wrong to another. Taken to its extreme, some cultural practices that are against human rights would be valid; widespread disregard, abuse and violation of human rights would be given legitimacy. For instance, a culture practicing female genital mutilation – the woman undergoing this operation is put at a very high risk to the extent of death. However, despite the pain and the mortality rate it causes, the practice is not sanctioned because it is culturally accepted and exercised. 

Reconciling cultural relativism and human rights for me is quite not possible (given the aforementioned) because the idea of human rights basically stems from a particular culture’s practices and beliefs; what is ethical for this culture may be unethical to another, so it just cancels out each other.

I believe that universal human rights supersede what is culturally relative in the sense that it protects and respects the most basic right of every human – the right to live. If a culture practices a “culture” that defends and uplifts lives, and promotes the health and well-being of the people… it is only then that relativism among cultures can reconcile with the universal human rights.

Metanoia

Does it make you less of a human if you’re more of a woman than a man? From the glorious 1st world countries to the developing 3rd world countries, various individuals suffer and endure bigotry, discrimination, slander, cruel and sadistic assaults every day just because of their gender identity and sexual orientation. 

Lesbians, gays, bisexuals, and transsexuals (LGBT) around the world combat discrimination and harassment 24/7. In fact, according to the United Nations’ Office of the High Commissioner for Human Rights, homosexuality in more than 70 nations remains a criminal offence. Gay men and lesbians who expose themselves are at jeopardy to arrest, imprisonment, torture, and death penalty to the extent. With all these injustices, isn’t it difficult already for a woman to be trapped in a man’s body or for a man to be trapped in a woman’s body to live without acceptance from the world? A personal struggle added by societal discrimination, can normal person handle that? Thus, to all the LGBTs who fought hard and stood firm for their rights and what they believe in, I raise my glass to you. 

The Human Soul Exhibit which I attended last Wednesday, July 15, 2011, at the Alliance Francaise de Cebu in QC Pavillion featured the voices of the distinguished LGBT community; their life stories, transitions, struggles, experiences, their plea to fight against discrimination (and end its devious cycle eventually), and their cries to uplift their human rights. 

The said exhibit was really an eye-opening experience for me. All these time I have perceived that our country, the Philippines is a gay-friendly nation. However, upon listening to Jonas Bagas, the Vice Chairperson of TLF Share (a NGO providing safe sex education for gay men) who wholeheartedly opened up his life story and personal struggles, I came to the conclusion that the perception I had (and most of the people) was indeed just a myth. 

And yes, I agree with Sass Roganda, co-founder of the Society of Transsexual Women in the Philippines (STRAP), who believed that not only a change of law is needed to eradicate the abuses but a change of “mind” amongst the people as well. A lot of individuals do not know what LGBTs’ pleas are all about, what and who they are as a person, their struggles, and their human rights. They don’t understand them. As a result, persecution comes into play. 

This change of mind will only happen if the people are informed and educated. However, in our country, most of the teachers (not all) and the people are brought up in a way that they are accustomed to the conventional gender roles assigned to children by doctors at birth basing on the organ spotted between their legs in the first place. They grimace at children and people who go against the customs. So how can they be effective educators if they are prejudiced? A bountiful percentage of our country’s population are composed of Christians. And as we all know, most of the priests/pastors condemn people who stray away for the teachings of the Lord as reflected in the “Scripture”, e.g. “That He created man and woman.” (No lesbian and gay, neither bisexual nor transsexual.) Ironic isn’t it? They are supposed to be the people intended to lead peace, harmony and unity in the world, and to eradicate division and discrimination among the people. Since they teach us to love our neighbours and even our enemies, thus, they should also educate the people to love each other despite the “diversity”, and that we must accept and forgive each others‘“flaws”. 

Yes. Education will plays a great role in the chain action, as Humphrey Gorriceta (spokesperson for the National Federation of Filipinos living with HIV and AIDS) pointed out. With comprehension comes action, and this will open the door to the room of change – change of mind. However, a change of mind is not enough as well. Metanoia or a change of heart is also a requirement for the people who have “changed their minds” to “accept” their “new perspective” – because understanding doesn’t necessarily translate to acceptance. With acceptance, then we will realize that we are all created equal. All of us are human beings who need equal human rights. 

And if we really are all created equal… if it really doesn’t matter who we are or what we look like…or who we love… Should freedom have to wait any longer? Should equality be something we schedule? We are agents of change. We have the power to compel change. And so we must act now. 

Timeless Vanity

Perhaps you've read my previous post. You got it right. This one's correlated to that.

. . . so while waiting for the time, for me and my partner to go to Naga (a first class municipality in Cebu near the shorelines) to conduct an interview, I got bored. As a result, I decided to unleash the fashionista spirit lurking within me. I acquiesced to my very vain alter ego. And viola! I had fun with my webcam.

I believe this picture right here is enough to describe how narcissistic I could be. (hahaha!) My hippie headband and overall get-up (which is also what I wore for the interview) inspired me to reveal this vain and happy-go-lucky aspect of me. 

This is the overall outfit. And this captured moment was taken in Naga after the interview. :)) 

It's Complicated

Last Wednesday (December 2, 2010), me and my partner in class had scheduled to interview the Human Resource Manager of an international company located in Naga, Cebu, Philippines. The interview was one of the numerous requirements that we needed to comply for our Psych 185 subject (Industrial Organization). And it doesn't stop with the interview for the reason that we also have to make a formal paper out of it and we are asked to report about it in class on Monday. 

Anyway, that's not the only thing we have to deal with on Monday because we also need to craft another paper for our other major subject. Here, we are asked to make TWO different papers. Yes, you got that right. We needed to make two papers. Furthermore, to come up with Paper 1, we needed to conduct an interview AGAIN with at least 5 respondents (five parents who are currently raising little kids at home). And then, we have to assess all the responses and explain them through the various theories we have discussed in all of the Psychology subjects we had, since 1st year college (Oh! by the way, I'm a 3rd year college student now). Moreover, with Paper 2, to come up with it I have to review my whole life story, all the memories I could remember. Then again, I have to explain certain behaviors, events that had changed my life, and the person I had become today through the theories discussed.

Now back to my problem. Where do I find 5 parents with little kids? Will they allow me to interview them? How do I multiply my time to be able to make three major papers in 24 hours? What paper will I do first? 

Complicated, isn't it? Complicated seems to be an understatement. Welcome to my life.

To Tag or Untag

Labeling a patient with his 'diagnosed' disorder is apt for physiological illness so that a fitting solution or medication on how to cure him will be given by the doctors (and by those attending his well-being). But when it comes to a person who is psychologically ill, it is not appropriate to tag him with the disorder for the reason that it hinders the treatment process.

In the article published by D.L. Rosenhan On Being Sane in Insane Places, pseudopatients who have been labelled as schizophrenic in a psychiatric assessment can do nothing to overcome the tag. The tag profoundly colors people’s (i.e doctors, nurses, and staff in the psychiatric hospital) perceptions of him. All of his explicit behaviour is explained in terms of his ‘tag’. Even if certain behaviour is stimulated by an external stimulus, it is still usually misattributed to the pseudopatient’s "disorder".

This has been pointed out by Gestalt psychology, demonstrated by Asch in his Warm versus Cold study. Central personality traits (such as “warm” versus “cold”) are very powerful that they strikingly color the meaning of other information in forming an impression of a given personality. For instance, one would perceive more positively Person A who is described as warm, intelligent, and handsome compared to Person B who is described as cold, intelligent, and handsome. Furthermore, when a person is diagnosed as "abnormal", "schizophrenic", or "manic-depressive" (probably all of which are potent central traits), then perhaps all of his actions and characteristics, may be colored by the label.

A psychiatric label has a life of its own. Once the impression has been formed that the patient is schizophrenic, the expectation is that he will continue to be schizophrenic. Thus, it hampers treatment. The diagnosis shape perceptions of the circumstances instead of the circumstances shaping the diagnosis.

In addition, the diagnosis somehow acts as a self-fulfilling prophecy on the part of the patient. Eventually, the patient himself accepts the diagnosis, with all of its superfluous meanings and expectations, and behaves accordingly, which does not aid or facilitate treatment process at all.

Sugarmuffin

Alright, so there's this guy. Well, he is not the typical kind of guy for me. He possesses countless of things that I have not seen in all the guys I've met (and i know that I'll never find another guy like him).


He makes me feel so alive. He makes my heart race that I could frantically hear it thudding in my ears. He's always on my mind, running through my head every second of every day. (I know. It sounds really cheesy and cliche-ish, but that's how it is.) And yes, just the thought of him curves my lips, making me smile like crazy while I'm alone or with a group of companions sitting down or walking on the street. I'm always in the state of euphoria every time we're together. He makes me happy. . . Ugh. It's frustrating, I can't find the right words to describe him and the way he makes me feel for the reason that the aforementioned and the things I'm about to say are just understatements. 


It's like if the world were to end tomorrow, he would be the person I would want to spend my last day with. Perhaps, he is the person I want to grow old with(*attach intense emotion here*). The feeling is too wonderful that in order to understand and know it, you've got to feel it yourself first. For the lack of better words, "I love him with every cell of my body" won't suffice. I mean, I just love him. I really do.


And oh, have I told you that the guy I was talking about happens to be my better half now? Yes. I haven't, right? So, the ulterior message behind or the real purpose why I'm telling you all those silly things is for you to have the 'tiniest' idea how blessed I am to have him in my life.


To conclude this silly note, I'm very proud to share that he wrote a song for me (see below). Did I just say he wrote a song for me? (hahahaha!) Yes, he composed this song for me as we celebrated one of our 'monthsaries' a year ago. If you're wondering who this awesome guy is, he goes by the name Kennan (it's pronounced as keeee-nun, he's very particular on that). And again you may wonder, "What's with the song's title?" Oh well, let's just say that the composer lovingly calls me (his) Sugarmuffin. Awwwwww, isn't he so sweet? :)




Sugarmuffin

The day's starting to come to an end
but I'm still thinking about you and your face
I won't wait for tomorrow to become yesterday
to tell you everything that I need to say
I won't wait for the stars to fall from the sky
to prove to you that I


Refrain
I've fallen hard and will keep on falling
I'll keep on falling for you...


Chorus
Oh, my heart screams, thanking all the heavens
For finding a girl like you, whoa, a girl like you
You're all I've ever wanted, all I've dreamed for
I've tasted your whole soul, you keep me longing for more

My day's starting to become better
you brighten up every stormy morning (whoa, whoa)
Yesterday you were just a friend for me
But today tells a totally different story
My heart's realized you're all its looking for
and I'll prove to you that

Refrain
I've fallen hard and will keep on falling
I'll keep on falling for you...

Chorus
Oh, my heart screams, thanking all the heavens
For finding a girl like you, whoa, a girl like you
You're all I've ever wanted, all I've dreamed for
I've tasted your whole soul, you keep me longing for more

Bridge 1
No one's ever precisely hit my heart before
But you prove to be too good a marksman
And my heart's all yours to keep

Bridge 2
I'm know I'm not perfect but
I'll be the best for you
I know at times we'd have our backs against the wall
But don't you forget
I'll be there to catch you should you fall... Chorus
Oh, my heart screams, thanking all the heavens
For finding a girl like you, whoa, a girl like you
You're all I've ever wanted, all I've dreamed for
I've tasted your whole soul, you keep me longing for more

Chorus
Oh, my heart screams, thanking all the heavens
For finding a girl like you, whoa, a girl like you
You're all I've ever wanted, all I've dreamed for
I've tasted your whole soul, you keep me longing for more

Whoa, oh


-------> This is one helluva cheesy post. I know, right?

Face Yourself

            Self-esteem, by definition, is how people evaluate themselves. Its synonyms include self-worth, self-regard, self-confidence, and pride. (Baumeister, 2005)

Having high self-esteem is good. People with high self-esteem may indeed have accurate perceptions of their many “fine” qualities, and knowing these “fine” qualities (either specific or abstract) in a way could result to happiness. It feels good to think that you are a good person, right?  Moreover, another benefit of it is initiative – people with high self-esteem, because they are sure of themselves, are more likely than others to act on their self beliefs and impulses. It is easier for them to make new friends, and promote self to others – and feeling good for doing so. (Baumeister, 2005)

However, when feeling good about themselves becomes a prime directive, for these people excessive defensiveness and self-promotion are likely to follow. Thus, the self-esteem is likely to be fragile rather than secure. Heightened defensiveness reflects insecurity, fragility and less-than-optimal functioning (i.e lashing out at others when one’s beliefs, statements, or values are threatened) rather than a healthy psychological outlook. (Kernis, 2008)

So, “Is high self esteem always good?”

For me, it’s a matter of context. High self-esteem is always good if you are not driven to make yourself superior to others or to prove your value by comparing yourself against other people. Or if your sense of high self-esteem does not arise at other people’s expense (i.e bullying other people because you want to prove yourself). But rather, you find joy from being who you are, not from being better than someone else. Once you start comparing yourself to other people or other things, you are bound to find faults.­ True self esteem can only come from within you, if you are confident in yourself and in what you do, it will be reflected in your work and in how you treat people.

If having high self esteem leads to happiness, I don’t think it’s wrong to have it always. Just stay real. Just be yourself and have enough confidence to show to the world who and what you really are. 

Happiness: A Journey

We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get married, have a baby, then another. Then we are frustrated that the kids aren't old enough and we'll be more content when they are. After that, we're frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with. We will certainly be happy when they are out of that stage.
          
We tell ourselves that our life will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together, when we get a nicer car, are able to go on a nice vacation, when we retire.

          The truth is, there's no better time to be happy than right now.  If not now, when? Your life will always be filled with challenges.  It's best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway. One of my favourite quotes comes from Alfred D Souza. He said, "For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there were always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, or a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my "life".

          This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. So, treasure every moment that you have and treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time...and remember that time waits for no one.

          So, stop waiting until you finish school, until you go back to school, until you lose ten pounds, until you gain ten pounds, until you have kids, until your kids leave the house, until you start work, until you retire, until you get married, until you get divorced, until Friday night, until Sunday morning, until you get a new car or home, until your car or home is paid off, until spring, until summer, until fall, until winter, until you are off welfare, until the first or fifteenth, until your song comes on, until you've had a drink, until you've sobered up, until you die, until you are born again to decide that there is no better time than right now to be happy.
          Happiness is a journey, not a destination.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------->P.S.

I did not write this one. I just found this over the internet and I could not help myself but repost this (I edited some parts of it though) because I wanna share its beauty with you all. I could not give necessary credit to the author since he/she was anonymous. So, to whoever wrote this one, I raise my glass to you. :)